#1 - My First Virgin Pussy & Ass Vibrating Realistic Masturbator

For when she doesn’t treat you right.

It’s was my 31st birthday and all I wanted was sex. No stupid gifts, no fancy cakes, just down and dirty sex. I said I wanted anal. She responded with her palm. I rubbed my skin in circles to release the pain. The real blow struck my ego, and traveled to my cock. That night I slept alone.

My next birthday was different. This time I’d get what I want – even if she said no. So, I went online to MyBedroomSpice and ordered My First Virgin Pussy & Ass Masturbator.

When she fell asleep, I snuck out, lubed up, and sank into 6 deep inches of super-tight, soft ‘n’ smooth virgin pussy. To my surprise, the RealSkin really felt real. The variable speed bullet tickled my balls like a schoolgirl on crack. When I was done with the front, I flipped er’ over and penetrated that ass so hard I thought she’d blow.

Stop Using Your Hand. Hit It How You Want.

How It Looks

Benefits & Features

  • Orgasmic Benefits
    • Tight duel entry stroker grips your shaft like a virgin every time
    • Lifelike RealSkin ™ lets you glide right in and really feels real
    • Sculpted details take your imagination for a ride.
    • Voluptuous 6” love tunnels - prove your manhood in the front or rear
    • Grab her as hard as you want, and show her who’s boss
    • Plus, she never says no
  • Quick & Dirty Features
    • Length: 6 inches
    • Entry: Ass & Pussy
    • Needs 2 AA batteries
  • What Our Customers Think

#2 - Max Result Penis Pump

Big just got a whole lot bigger.

I stood in my skibbies, pup tent and all. A perfect ten at my front. Five-nine, dirty blonde, and curves so tight she’d snap me in half. Open thighs called out, “Johnson. Dive in!” Seriously, they don’t make em’ better than this.

But, when my briefs hit the floor, my world crashed. All five and a half inches were hard as hell. So, why was she laughing? Then it got worse. She clicked a pic, put her clothes on and took off before I could blink. I stood there like a fool.

It turns out, I’m average. Girls like her don’t do average.

My only thought was, Girls won’t laugh when I get the Max Results Penis Pump. I ordered instantly. It shipped blazing fast, so I used it right away. I slid into the pump with ease. It was natural. The silicone ring at the base created an airtight seal for maximum pressure. The handle was large and pumping was easy. When I’d reached my full potential, I released the air valve, and pulled out my new, super-powered manhood.

Oh yeah!

Pump Up Your Ego.

How It Looks

Benefits & Features

  • Orgasmic Benefits
    • 9 ¼ inch cylinder helps you slide right in
    • Silicone ring creates an airtight seal for maximum pump
    • Quick release valve lets air out fast so you can get to business
    • Sleek design and metallic finish prove it’s built to last
    • Never be laughed at again.
  • Quick & Dirty Features
  • What Our Customers Think

#3 - Optimum Power Realistic Blow Job Stroker

BJs on Demand? 

When was the last time a warm tongue and deep throat swallowed you with no drama? A completely unprovoked, sexual experience where you didn’t have to return the favor. Yeah, that’s what I thought.

Luckily, it’s not a myth. With the Optimum Power Realistic Blowjob Stroker, you can go as deep as you want for as long as you want. Imagine gagging a throat with the full length of your cock. Every day. Without sass.

That’s the power of this amazingly realistic mouth. Slide your dick through ultra-soft lips and let our stroker beads move along your shaft, imitating the mouth’s textures. Adjustable speeds let you change the giddy up, and you can even blow your load inside. Clean up is a breeze.

Disclaimer: Not responsible if it replaces your spouse.

How It Looks

Benefits & Features

  • Orgasmic Benefits
    • This Mouth Can’t Talk Back.
    • Throat replicating texture for mind-blowing pleasure
    • Stroker beads for the suck of your life
    • Adjustable speed control so you can get more intense
    • Works well with lube for an ultra-moist feel
    • Easy cleanup so you can go again in minutes
  • Quick & Dirty Features
    • Length: 9 inches
    • Width: 3.25 inches
    • Needs 4 x AA batteries
    • Non-toxic plastic, and soft-touch rubber
  • What Our Customers Think

#4 - Dr Joel Kaplan Vibrating Prostate Massager

Stimulate that ass!

Last Tuesday I came home late. She was already in bed, and I was horny.

A perfect chance to grab my new tool and watch porn. I slipped off my shoes and tip toed through the house.

Man cave quiet. I locked the door. On the desk was my porn tablet, behind me a safe. Combo entered, the vault slid open. There in the center, glimmering under fluorescent lights, was my brand new, Dr. Joel Kaplan Vibrating Prostate Massager.

Pants off, porn on. The plastic was cool against my ass. It breathed new life into my world. If only my friends knew what they were missing.

When the vibrations started, I was stiff – gently massaging the rim. I moved in small, rhythmic circles to the beat of Hollywood sex. I grew closer to climax. Closer. Closer. When I was about to explode, I let the egg head penetrate. It was all over.

OMG. Did she hear me scream?


How It Looks

Benefits & Features

  • Orgasmic Benefits
    • Vibrators – Not Just for Women.
    • Vigorous vibrations stimulate blood flow and increase pleasure
    • Shapely plastic handle ensures you the perfect grip
    • Waterproof materials so you can get creative
    • Made with non-toxic materials so you can relax
    • Get off like never before.
  • Quick & Dirty Features
    • Length: 8.25 inches
    • Circumference: 3 inches
    • Needs 2 x AA batteries
    • Made in the USA
  • What Our Customers Think

#5 - Fetish Fantasy Unisex Hollow 6 Inch Vibrating Strap-On

Two pleasured for the price of one.

Me and my girl were looking to spice things up. We tried every product under the sun. Cock rings, anal beads, stupid paint. None of it worked. At least not for both of us. I liked the cock rings, but they didn’t get her off. The anal beads were fun, but they always went in my butt! The paint was, well, boring.

We were just about to give up, when we stumbled on the Fetish Fantasy Unisex Hollow 6 Inch Vibrating Strap-On. We looked at each other and said, “What the hell.”

Who knew that 6 inches of vibrating cock would transform our lives. My dick fit perfectly in the slot, and the vibrations created intense sensations up my back. The shaft strapped snug against my body ensured that we were good to go. Even for rough sex. Better still, she had, like, ten pulsating orgasms.

Our relationship has never been better!

How It Looks

Benefits & Features

  • Orgasmic Benefits
    • Spice Things Up.
    • Powerful vibrations create intense orgasms anytime
    • Unisex strap-on so you and your partner can take turns
    • Upturned tip for precision g-spot or prostate stimulation
    • Great for rough sex
    • Never be bored again
  • Quick & Dirty Features
    • Length: 6.5 inches
    • Girth: 5.5 inches
    • Width: 1.6 inches
    • Material: PVC, elasticized nylon
    • Needs 2 AA batteries
  • What Our Customers Think

#6 - Lelo TOR 2 Luxury Rechargeable Multispeed Vibrating Cock Ring

Buy the best. Because you can.

Disclaimer: Not the “every man’s” cock ring.

You’ve just returned from the hottest club in town. A bombshell on your arm, drink in hand. You’ve known her less than a few hours, but things are looking up. You can tell she’s not like others. She’s a 10 and demands performance. Can you deliver?

Now her clothes are off. A goddess on your bed. Perfect contours lead to hard nipples and down to closed thighs. Nail this and you’re the envy of all. But you’ve been drinking. You can’t afford to blow it. You can’t afford a half-cocked member.

You grab a box from the nightstand. Her interest is peeked. A thick, master crafted LELO TOR 2 Vibrating Cock Ring dangles from your finger. She smiles. You slide it on. She beckons. You start the vibrations. Her thighs open.

You’re in.

How It Looks

Benefits & Features

  • Orgasmic Benefits
    • Performance. Pleasure. Class. It Starts Here.
    • Twice as much power as the original Lelo
    • 6 Intense speeds cause unearthly orgasms for both of you
    • Top-side bullet flicks her clit 1,000’s of time per minute
    • Superior silicone ring hugs your cock for tight, satisfying play
    • Stretch ability means even the well endowed, like you can use it
    • Waterproof for shower time
    • 1 year LELO® warranty backs your quality purchase
  • Quick & Dirty Features
    • Rings: x 1
    • Max Diameter: 2.5”
    • Stretchable
    • Stimulator Style: Clitoris
    • Multi-Speed
    • Multi-Function
    • Temperature Sensitive
    • Hypoallergenic
    • Rechargeable
  • What Our Customers Think

#7 - Classix Penis Power Pump

When you need size, rely on Classix.

Every time I look in the mirror, I wish I were bigger. I’m six foot four, and covered in muscle. That’s great, until my pants come off. Being big makes my dick look small. I’m an alpha male, but I cower like a girl in front of a women.

But all that changed when I bought a Classix Penis Power Pump. I’d heard my bros talk about it for years. They swore it could increase size. Not only that, but they said I’d be so pumped, so fast, that my confidence would explode through the roof.

I thought it was BS. Turns out, I thought wrong.

My first pump really increased my size. I couldn’t believe it. I was bigger, stronger, tougher. I was a real alpha male now. I had so much confidence and T, that I nailed chicks that very same night. NO PROBLEM.

I use this thing every day without fail. The 7.5 inch cylinder slides perfectly over my shaft. The rubber sleeve at the bottom creates an airtight seal. Even after hundreds of uses I still get my daily pump on. If you want quality, durability, and results, then this is the penis pump you need.

It’s time to get your grow on.

How It Looks

Benefits & Features

  • Orgasmic Benefits
    • Classix Results You Can Count On.
    • Airtight seal ensures maximum pump every time
    • Reliable name you can depend on for years
    • Safe for frequent pumping
    • Release air quickly and spend more time penetrating
  • Quick & Dirty Features
    • Canal Diameter: 2 inches
    • Texture: Smooth
    • Material: Plastic
    • Splash proof
    • Non-toxic
  • What Our Customers Think

#8 - Lelo Billy Luxury Rechargeable Vibrating Prostate Massager

Why aren’t you treating your whole body with class?

I sip a sparkling glass of dark whiskey and glance out over the ocean. Warm rays illuminate my bare chest. A sea breeze caresses my face carrying a perfect silence. I relax into a lounge chair, and listen to sea gulls chirping just off the balcony of my private yacht. Almost perfect.

Almost, but something’s missing. Ah, that’s it. How can one truly experience pleasure without total relaxation. For men, there’s only one way to achieve it a vibrating prostate massage.

Good thing I brought my Lelo Billy Luxury Rechargeable Vibrating Prostate Massager. The ultimate precision tool for intense prostate stimulation. I just press the soft, ergonomic tip against my hole, and allow forbidden pleasures to engulf my entire world.

Luxury has never felt so good.

How It Looks

Benefits & Features

  • Orgasmic Benefits
    • Increase Pleasure with Class
    • Silicone body, and curved shaft for added pleasure
    • 6 modes so you’ll never get bored
    • Enjoy up to 4 hours of life on a 2 hour charge
    • Simple controls make speed changes effortless
    • Lockable so it never starts when you’re not using it
    • Presented in a beautiful gift box that lifts your spirits
    • 1 year LELO® warranty backs your quality purchase
  • Quick & Dirty Features
    • Length: 6.75 inches
    • Circumference: 3.5 inches
    • Rechargeable battery
    • Quiet motor
  • What Our Customers Think

#9 - TENGA Silver Flip Hole Male Masturbator

The future of male masturbation.

Welcome to the future. The year, 2015. It’s Friday night and you’re home alone, again. There’s nothing on T.V. and your computer just exploded. What do you do? You get your Tenga Silver Flip Hole Masturbator out, and have a party. That’s what!

The Tenga Silver is the future of male masturbation. It’s sleek lines help you leave your world and entire a place of fantasy and pleasure. From the first time you plunge through her soft lips and fill her textured six inch hole, you’ll know you made the right choice.

When your shaft envelops her inner walls, the elastomer material causes a rebounding sensation. A unique maze of ridges on the inside ensures a more realistic feel than anything you can imagine. You can even dial up the intensity for power-packed orgasms.

This ain’t grandpa’s toy. It’s the future. Get yours now.

They sure didn’t predict this in Back to the Future.

How It Looks

Benefits & Features

  • Orgasmic Benefits
    • Includes a choice of 3 lubricants for exclusive use with your Flip Hole: Mild: Mild and soft with a silky feeling Real: Incredibly moisturizing and feels just like the real thing Wild: Menthol based for an invigorating experience
  • Quick & Dirty Features
    • Canal diameter: 0.75 Internal Length: 6 inches Material: TPE Contains latex: No Contains phthalates: No Waterproof: Submersible
  • What Our Customers Think

#10 - Fetish Fantasy Elite 10 Inch Hollow Strap-On in Black

Make her wish you were smaller

We love sex, but I feel like she’s faking. Don’t get me wrong, I’m always hard. But, I have a little dick and I don’t think she likes it. Yeah, I said it. I’ve got a small dick. Plus I’m white, and she keeps yappin’ about chocolate.

But not anymore. Last night, right before our romp, I whipped out 10 massive inches of thick black cock. Her jaw dropped. I smiled.

She thought she’d wear it. But when I showed her the hollow shaft and slid my cock in, she was already wet. We pounded for hours in every position. I penetrated her deeper than ever before. She even screamed my name, “Girth! So much Girth!” She came at least 10 times. Even better, I didn’t feel like a loser anymore.

Extend Your Manhood and Let Her Taste Chocolate.

How It Looks

Benefits & Features

  • Orgasmic Benefits
    • 10 inches of dark cock penetrate to her core
    • 6.25” of girth fill stretch her holes to their limits
    • Strap-on straps snug and won’t fall off during rigorous sex
    • Bulging veins intensify her pleasure times 10
    • If you’re feeling adventurous, she can wear it too
  • Quick & Dirty Features
    • 10 inches long
    • Girth 6.25 inches
    • Width 2 inches
  • What Our Customers Think